In a shocking turn of events that has college football fans clutching their pearls, former Kentucky wide receiver Dane Key has decided he’s had enough of bluegrass and is heading to Nebraska—because who wouldn’t want to trade in a 4-8 season for the Cornhuskers? Key, who spent last season playing catch with defenders, led the Wildcats with a whopping 47 receptions for 715 yards, which is about as impressive as a cat that can open a door. Now, he’s ready to don the red and white of Nebraska, posting a picture in his new jersey with a heart emoji and the phrase ‘GBR’—because, you know, nothing says ‘I’m serious about my football career’ like social media emojis. With 126 receptions and 14 touchdowns under his belt, Key is clearly looking to add to his stats—hopefully with a bit more success than Kentucky’s last season. Let’s hope his new team can turn his talent into victories because if there’s one thing worse than a transfer, it’s being a talented player stuck on a losing team. So here’s to Dane Key, may his new journey be less about running away and more about running toward glory—or at least a better record than 4-8! Go, Dane, and may your catches be many and your losses few!
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